tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38365583344665532922024-03-25T04:22:14.102-07:00Michael D'Orazio Speaks/LiteratureMichael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.comBlogger28125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-3792029867545326552024-03-25T03:02:00.001-07:002024-03-25T04:21:41.174-07:00Facebook Diaries (03/25/2024)I do believe the educational system is teaching children to hate... But just because they believe the teachers doesn't mean the children won't suffer the destructive consequences of hate... Their basically teaching children to self destruct...<div><br></div><div><div>The new word for being offended by someone is called "Triggering"... If you speak without offensive words and it still pisses them off it means it's your intensity that offends them... "You're triggering me"...<span>They say... Now it's beyond ridiculous... It's like they don't have a reason to hate you, so now they're making shit up... It's your fire that offends them...</span></div></div><div><span><br></span></div><div><span>Going to bars has always been problematic, especially if you're an odd ball... But lately there is more discrimination, by patrons and bartenders... Barmaids are the worst, the most wicked... They hire tyrants to run the bar... If they don't like you they team up w/ asshole patrons and eventually bully you then kick you out for no reason... Lately it has been getting worse... Now they just kick you out after your first sip of beer...</span></div><div><span><br></span></div><div><span>Public life has definitely deteriorated, Bars are a liability, maybe dangerous at this point... Restaurants aren't about the dining experience anymore like the 90's, now their run by slimy grease balls who have no class or ethics... They make trouble for their guests and patrons, and they just want the money & power over people... And the food is not made out of zest or passion... And Diners are not there for after a night of drinking... The restaurant era is over...</span></div><div><span><br></span></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-85180998336472567182024-03-24T08:01:00.001-07:002024-03-25T01:52:58.900-07:00Facebook Diaries #1 (03/24/2024) [Parental Abuse / Hypochondria / Reverse Racism / Spirituality / Femininity]<b>The only way a man can truly love a woman is to love the woman inside him, his feminine side... That's why patriarchal males are toxic and abuse their women... They call me gay because they're jealous I have the courage to embrace femininity as an essential part of humanity... Dylan said God is a woman... Some say women are superior to men because they create life... Yin can't exist without yang...</b><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>There's nothing more abusive than having a parent who is a hypochondriac... Because they're so focused on their own survival, they pollute themselves with pharmaceuticals, go to the doctors constantly, they're miserable...they impose their beliefs on you, and if they die, they think a light will go out in the world... And the whole world will mourn their death... What makes them sick is they're lack of love, laughter, and thriving... They have a black hole inside their soul... I'd rather them be an alcoholic...<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>Everytime my father hurt me I ran to the bar and cried to the bartenders... Everytime my dad hurt me my car broke down and he had to pay out... One time I was in the living room and he punched me in the arm for no reason... I said, "Why did you do that...???" He said, "Because you were too close." Then I said "I'm outta here." And I left... He went and opened the back storm door and the wind smashed it to smithereens... Cost him $300... Then the next time he hurt me he later fell off a ladder and hurt his shoulder... See how the spirits work!!!!<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>I started my spiritual journey in my mid twenties when I studied Buddhism, Taoism, Kundalini, even Hinduism... I had a liberal college education, and when I graduated I took on the verse "The Lord is Thy Shepherd, though shalt not want..." Which is parallel to Buddhist cessation of desire... And I sat on a comfy couch and life took me for a rollercoaster ride...<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>During a rough time I steered away from my prior influences and focused on Charles Bukowski... You think your life was shitty... His Dad was more abusive than mine... If you think your life was bad read his Bio, it'll bring you comfort knowing he became victorious...</b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>There's nothing like a near death experience to liberate your soul... The only way to conquer death is to die then resurrect...</b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>I don't regret getting hurt or taking risks to better my life or others, I don't regret falling in love with the wrong people, I don't regret smoking cigarettes, I don't regret drinking alcohol, I don't do drugs, I don't regret the sex I had... I don't regret leaving the church, I don't regret going to art school even though my dad wanted me to be a chemical engineer, I don't regret punching out my father, I don't regret telling people like it is even though they're jerking me around... I don't regret not going gay even though I love glam rock... I don't regret expressing my true opinions in a judgemental world.<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>During the pandemic my father tried to use the pandemic to psychologically torture me as the landlord plotted against me. I could have succumb but my faith kept me strong and aware... After all that was said and done I survived calamity once again & my Dad pushed the oatmeal away from himself at the table. I tried to forgive & make peace, but then he tried to finish me off. I survived again. He did not care the landlord was trying to do me in, after I expressed terror. I realized my family life was over before I decided to punch him out, so it didn't matter anyways, they dropped the charges.. Because I had a strong case against him<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>There's so much reverse racism nowadays... I live in Norristown and it's a ghetto because it's a low income section... I live in a better neighborhood surrounded by churches, but the landlord and the tenants treated me like garbage, a spoiled white boy... Which I wasn't... They knew nothing about my past... And didn't take the time to get to know my true self... I worked for everything I had and got a pittance from my family... I secured finances when I went to the University... Held menial work and hospitality... And became an accomplished artist musician... I didn't dress like a gentleman until the pandemic... They think I'm rich...<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>I was always a dreamer because I hated my life... So in school I looked out the window and drew while the teachers were talking... Every turn I took to better myself ended up in a dead end... When I tried to inspire people they hated on me... When I give emotional handouts I got nothing in return, when I loved a person they took it and ran... When I admired somebody and wanted a friend they played mind games... "What a Wonderful World"<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>One time I had some extra food stamps and brought some cakes and danish to my mom and Dad... My Dad then asked me "Do you want to go to church with us..." And I said "No"... Because I thought a 52 year old man would look retarded going single with his elderly parents... Plus I don't believe in organized religion even though I'm spiritual and study theology... So he goes in the garage and gets a baseball bat and acts all psycho... And kicks me out of his house... (Why go to church that ain't Christian...)<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>My sister called me spoiled, it's half true... On one side I suffer tremendously, on the other hand since I suffer I feel I deserved better... Which leads people to believe it's all about me... Try building relationships when people throw my offerings back in my face...<br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>Well today I'm bored... I'm sick of the usual routines... That and I'm broke again... Being the outspoken a-hole I am doesn't pay the bills...</b></div><div><br></div><div><b>-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</b></div><div><b> (Extras)</b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>Is it possible hair is actually alive, because when I'm in a sad gloomy mood my hair looks grey, but when I revert to a sunny mood it turn back to brown quickly... Is it possible hair color is controlled by our moods... Like a mood ring...</b><br></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b>"The Christian Devil's (& the Children of Light) song I did on my new album clarifies the problem w/ Christian abuse, why children runaway, get institutionalized, get doped up and medicated, and turn to homosexuality... It solved a problem in my head after my Christian Landlord tried to murder me in my apartment, the disassociation of church, and my Catholic abusive father...</b><br></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><b><br></b></div><div><br></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-22139719884687674622024-01-22T23:20:00.001-08:002024-03-13T21:15:21.090-07:00When the Weeks were Wicked (Poem)<div><div>One day after a long string of bad occurrences,</div><div>It took one more thing to trigger the sickness...</div><div>I ran to the toilet and puked,</div><div>Dry heaved a little bit of alcohol I drank...</div><div>But it wasn't the alcohol that made me puke,</div><div>The trauma, the abuse, the thuggery...</div><div>The technological failure,</div><div>The thievery...</div><div>The sabotage...</div><div>Then I drank to sleep,</div><div>In bed for weeks...</div><div>In my total darkness and despondence...</div><div>I lay my head on my pillow reeling,</div><div>Huffing and puffing, in utter agony...</div><div>The weather was raging outside...</div><div>Rainy winds howling,</div><div>Just for me...</div><div>The backdrop for my despair and pain...</div><div>Immobile, hearing the wicked winds...</div><div>For two weeks non stop,</div><div>I could not leave the house,</div><div>They said stay home... Do not venture out...</div><div>Then the snow came,</div><div>I did not notice,</div><div>But the streets were covered...</div><div>Ice, and snow plows tormented me...</div><div>Scraping, shuddering, banging...</div><div>I only left my apartment to get the vodka,</div><div>In the trunk of my car... </div><div>Infused with ginger and ginseng...</div><div>Alcoholism, or just cocktails to forget...</div><div>Stay home more often,</div><div>Forget people exist...</div><div>Complaining I have no one to lean on,</div><div>And the drama of conspiracy...</div><div>All in my head, or real...</div><div>Just a complainer writing a script in my head,</div><div>Crazy talk, paranoia, danger,</div><div>Depression, spiritual hi jinx....</div><div>Boredom....</div><div>Oblivion...</div><div>My emotions and weather in sync...</div><div>The frigid nights of my soul... </div></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-53800251594401329152024-01-22T23:18:00.001-08:002024-01-22T23:22:58.151-08:00The Neverending Story of Abandonment and Abuse (Poem)<div>Do you ever get tired of hanging me out to dry???</div><div>Do you ever get tired of opening the door then slamming it shut???</div><div>Do you ever get tired of taking gifts from someone,</div><div>then putting it on the table for others???</div><div>Do you ever get tired of breaking your dying mother's heart???</div><div>Instead of celebrating life you nurtured death,</div><div>Now all your friends are dying...</div><div>I won't die because I'm already dead...</div><div>You killed me hundreds of times...</div><div>I said my prayers and meditations, </div><div>And the light was restored...</div><div>But through darkness I see the truths of your evils...</div><div>I saw very clearly what evils you do...</div><div>And pleaded a million times for you</div><div>To change your ways...</div><div>But then you planned the final blow,</div><div>The one that surely would kill me...</div><div>A long dark tunnel...</div><div>A long dark forest,</div><div>With howling wolves and beasts,</div><div>Sharp fangs and howling banshees,</div><div>Trolls and Goblins hunting me down...</div><div>Dark beings, strange entities....</div><div>All stalked me in the rainy streets...</div><div>A long journey through a stormy sea...</div><div>Only to find dry land where life still existed...</div><div>But that wasn't good enough... </div><div>Every blow sent your mother hurdling down, </div><div>She was your pawn, a last case of action,</div><div>But now a dummy who can not die or live...</div><div>A stuffed voodoo doll... </div><div>The journey almost complete...</div><div>Dooms day, judgement day arrived...</div><div>The Game almost closed..,</div><div>The never ending song you sing,</div><div>The same story over and over,</div><div>Open prison cells that slam shut,</div><div>A speak hole, </div><div>Serving dishes of cold punishment,</div><div>And I'm still starving...</div><div>For love and company...</div><div>Or am I just selfish....</div><div><br></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-32536713958996262992023-11-01T15:11:00.001-07:002023-11-01T15:11:32.193-07:00SPOTIFY BIO #1<div><h1 align="CENTER"><font color="PINK"><i>"Modern Artist Michael D'Orazio is happiest when writing songs of pain, love, and loss...Sadness engulfs his work, as lost love is a reoccurring theme, speaking of past relationships, looking for reconciliation, and the dream of future hopes....Inspired by dark topics, and the realization of death.... Michael is no lightweight when it comes to addressing reality, or lost dreams...Hopeless Romanticism, and revelling in high expectations bring Michael to failed , or pessimistic perspectives, and create a darker vision to envisualize life as some cruel joke or bad dream.... Michael's musical journey was long and hard, a trail of tears, a never ending depressive episode of emotional violence and total rejection... Much can be analyzed about his life through his music, but much can be gained...</i></font></h1></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-86142746147449527642023-10-23T07:21:00.001-07:002023-10-23T07:21:39.964-07:00SPOTIFY BIO #2 (PANDEMIC)MICHAEL WAS AN OUTSIDER MOST OF HIS LIFE, A DRIFTER, A WANDERER, SITTING BY THE SIDE OF THE ROAD WATCHING THE WORLD PASS HIM BY... IN THAT TIME HE BECAME A PROLIFIC ARTIST AND SONGWRITER.... IT WASN'T UNTIL THE PANDEMIC DID DARKNESS FALL UPON THE EARTH AND THE VEIL OF MAYA (THE LAND OF ILLUSIONS) BECOME LIFTED... BUT EVEN THOUGH THE SUN SHINES THERE IS A SPIRITUAL ECLIPSE CASTING A SHADOW UPON THE EARTH... TRUTH HAS BEEN GUTTED, AND THE MEDIA A DISTRACTION... THE SECOND YEAR OF THIS KALI YUGA, MICHAEL MADE CONTACT WITH THE SUPERNATURAL, AS IF THE GATES HAD OPENED BETWEEN HIM AND THE SPIRIT WORLD... HE WAS TOLD AND GIVEN KNOWLEDGE TO COMBAT THE EVIL FORCES GOVERNING HUMANITY... ANOINTED A SHAMAN, BORN A POSSIBLE AVATAR... HIS MISSION CLEAR, AND HIS MOTIVES PURE... HEADED ON A COLLISION COURSE WITH THE LIES OF THOSE CLOSEST TO HIM... SPIRITUAL STORMS PASS BY LIKE RANDOM HURRICANES... AND THEN THE CHANGE AND TRANSFORMATIONS TAKE PLACE.. LIKE A STRANGER IN A DARK WORLD, HOLDING A LAMP TO LIGHT THE WAY.... RESTORING LIGHT WHERE DARKNESS HE ONCE LAID... LIKE KING BALI, AND VEMANA THE BEGGAR... WE ARE IN A DARK TUNNEL, THE APOCALYPSE, KALI YUGA, THIS IS A TEST. SURVIVE, SURVIVE, SURVIVE...<br>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-22091296299971080602023-10-23T07:18:00.003-07:002023-11-01T15:00:03.974-07:00Starbucks Coffee House 1998 (poem)<div><div>The day I moved back from the City,</div><div>I heard Starbucks opened down the street...</div><div>I mean I love coffee shops,</div><div>I used to go during college,</div><div>Because I left my friends behind...</div><div><br></div><div>I'd go to coffee shops to socialize...</div><div>Meet people... Open mics... After all,</div><div>Coffee shops are the center of community...</div><div>And the art world...</div><div>But Starbucks is corporate,</div><div>But I did not care....</div><div><br></div><div>The late 90's was a fair time....</div><div>Great music, punky people,</div><div>Etc...</div><div>On the patio they'd smoke pot, and cigarettes...</div><div>Drink coffee, and cappuccinos...</div><div>The view incredible...</div><div>A forest in the far background...</div><div>Trees galore...</div><div>A patio with a glorious view....</div><div><br></div><div>I sat by the window, drawing and writing poetry...</div><div>Listening to Beth Orton,</div><div>And wonderful music of the times....</div><div>I met several interesting people,</div><div>The baristas judgemental even then,</div><div>Snobbish, but accomodating....</div><div>I drew, and drew, hoping to forge a career...</div><div>Comics, and dark art, inspired by my favorite pop stars...</div><div>It was a fair time, </div><div>They were the carefree days...</div><div><br></div><div><br></div></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-73869516153224643032023-10-23T07:17:00.005-07:002023-11-01T15:29:28.909-07:00Mr. Apartment Manager (poem)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><div><div>From day one since I moved here, </div><div>You clocked me for what you thought I was worth...</div><div>A street kid, without a care...</div><div>You ignored my life's work,</div><div>My achievements, my striving,</div><div>My thriving, my fruitful prospering...</div><div>You mentioned my drinking,</div><div>My swearing of my discontempt for the system,</div><div>Using Christianity as a sword of authority</div><div>You became my father, of whom I didn't want...</div><div>The father who would give me sound advice, </div><div>To conform, denounce celebration,</div><div>And value money over love and friendship...</div><div>I became your unfinished stone, </div><div>and you became my chisel,</div><div>I was clay, and you became my mould...</div><div>But I dare say you spit on children,</div><div>With your spiritual ego...</div><div>God unites,</div><div>Satan divides...</div><div>Is that why you turned the tenants against me,</div><div>Infiltrated my home with bogus house sales,</div><div>Tortured me psychologically...</div><div><br></div><div>The landlord is your concubine...</div><div>His name is a she...</div><div>You wore the badge of sobriety as a trophy of honor,</div><div>But wait on the sidelines, watching, waiting,</div><div>For the drunken man to die...</div><div>Spiritual storms blew through my soul,</div><div>One after another...</div><div>Satanic energy, and waves of attack...</div><div>You cast the evil spell...</div><div>And as a man of faith, that I am,</div><div>I had to survive the illness,</div><div>And the injection of venom...</div><div>The only antidote was faith and hope...</div><div>The struggle finally killed me,</div><div>But like the fiery phoenix,</div><div>I rose from the ashes,</div><div>Renewed... Resurrected...</div><div>I became purified...</div><div>Through spiritual death,</div><div>And reincarnation...</div><div>Then I spoke of a murderer,</div><div>And that murderer was you...</div><div>Amen</div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-34881649696863009442023-10-23T07:16:00.003-07:002023-11-01T14:55:51.225-07:00The Hell Hounds (poem)<div>When I suffer I am in touch with the Almighty,</div><div>The Omnipotent, the Spirits, the Universe...</div><div>The stars guide me through the dark forests, </div><div>And the hungry wolves...</div><div>Those damn wolves, they're everywhere...</div><div><br></div><div>But when I transcend the dark, </div><div>And enter into the light,</div><div>That shone at the end of the dark tunnel...</div><div>There will always be the next set of problems,</div><div>When things are good, and I'm feeling fine,</div><div>When I'm chatty, the life of the party,</div><div>I look over my shoulder,</div><div>Through the wreckage, and the ruins of my past traumas...</div><div>The Hell Hounds are there, barking at me...</div><div>Behind me that is, in my ears...</div><div>They tell me things are good, fine...</div><div>But hell is waiting for my return....</div><div>They bark at me to keep going,</div><div>To walk the plank of fun and celebration...</div><div>To remind me,</div><div>Things are good now, </div><div>But don't take the good times for granted...</div><div><br></div><div>When a woman loves me... Here come the Hell Hounds</div><div>When money comes.... The Hell Hounds</div><div>When I'm the man with the most... The Hell Hounds...</div><div>When I'm at the center... The Hell Hounds...</div><div><br></div><div>They tell me often,</div><div>"We are watching you,</div><div>We are tormenting you, </div><div>We are haunting you...</div><div>When things are good, We will bark at you...</div><div>We are omnious, in fact an omen...</div><div>We are the Hell Hounds....</div><div>Your tormentor...</div><div>Barking..."</div><div>Amen</div><div><br></div><div><br></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-80800032512104423512023-10-23T07:15:00.003-07:002023-11-01T15:03:01.450-07:00First Love Seduction (poem)<div>My virginity was broken by my first love...</div><div>She was a wild child, </div><div>A lady of the night,</div><div>Clubber, seducer, opportunist...</div><div>Back then anything went...</div><div>Clubs, drugs, and alcohol...</div><div>Casual sex, Premiscuality...</div><div>A.I.D.S....</div><div>Though I'm lucky I never fell ill...</div><div>I took her infidelity with a grain of salt,</div><div>She told me of it to my face...</div><div>Over my head it went...</div><div>I kissed a girl at a party early in our relationship...</div><div>That was her revenge, ten fold...</div><div>It was below the belt, </div><div>Beneath my understanding...</div><div>We had good times together,</div><div>When she wasn't out with the cool guys,</div><div>Partying, and philandering....</div><div>I just waited around to be her fuck puppet,</div><div>Her what to do when she wasn't doing anything...</div><div>We broke up, got back together, </div><div>We broke up, got back together,</div><div>For three years, it was a cycle,</div><div>Of tears, and total deception...</div><div>I was young, and dumb,</div><div>Regardless of my talent,</div><div>My achievements did nothing,</div><div>But stimulate competitiveness,</div><div>Battle of the sexes....</div><div>Who would win in the end,</div><div>Boy or Girl...</div><div>Of course she won,</div><div>The odds stacked against me....</div><div>But I wouldn't let her hang over me, </div><div>Like the Sword of Damocles...</div><div>So I illustrated her to a tee, </div><div>And showed her for what she was...</div><div>I shall not say whore... </div><div>But a seducer of the naive...</div><div>I was led astray...</div><div>Like every other dumb cunt,</div><div>Who thought they wanted and deserved more...</div><div>I was weak, but also I was strong...</div><div>I gracefully glided through life,</div><div>Yet my life took me nowhere...</div><div>I'm deeper in garbage before I tried to escape...</div><div>Like an insect on a butterwort tree...</div><div>I always win over my soul,</div><div>But worldly success never came...</div><div>Broke, and desolate...</div><div>It never ends...</div><div>Amen</div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-18924150105999473112023-10-23T07:13:00.002-07:002023-10-23T07:25:29.159-07:00Humility, Faith, and an Attempted Suicide... (poem)<div>I woke up this morning after...</div><div>Realizing the possibility of mortality,</div><div>And life, thereafter...</div><div>Feeling like I aged 50 years in one day...</div><div>Lying in bed like a corpse... My outlook grey...</div><div>With tinted skin, and dirty eyes...</div><div>Feeling crippled, and in disguise...</div><div>I lay in bed almost beyond repair,</div><div>With feelings of reality, truth, and despair...</div><div>That day with my head face down on the pillow...</div><div>I wished, and wished myself a dead little fellow...</div><div>To crush my brain by sheer will...</div><div>But it wasn't happening, nor would it will..</div><div>So if I lay in bed and forgot my hunger...</div><div>And forget to feed, would I eventually slumber...</div><div>Taking too long, I decided I've had it...</div><div>So I took out my blade, and decided to stab it...</div><div>My wrist the target, but would I feel pain...</div><div>If it went deep enough, the blood would it drain...</div><div>A scarlet brook... Like bloody, bloody rain...</div><div>The point against my skin, and the pulsing of veins,</div><div>I tried to pierce this mark, I tried...</div><div>Three times a charm... Unlucky you'll find...</div><div>But like a force field, this was a sign.....</div><div>So the blade fell useless, we are all weak men,</div><div>And then the contractor pulled up, for our roof he had to mend...</div><div>I saw through the window... </div><div>And this morbid fantasy gone,</div><div>I jumped up with frustration, </div><div>For it was dawn...</div><div>I said "Damn it... this was just perfect timing!!!"</div><div>That was God's intervention, divining...</div><div>Just to remind me of humility and faith...</div><div>Death and Life are one in the same...</div><div>Mr. Death didn't come for me, he said...</div><div>And he took my blade away, like candy from a babe...</div><div>He got me on my feet,</div><div>Like a fallen hero,</div><div>Got me the hell up, so I made some espresso, </div><div>Turned the switch on, i turned up my stereo...</div><div>Ate some fruit, and a bowl full of hash...</div><div>Life goes on....</div><div>Time to take out the trash...</div><div>And go to the store...</div><div>My Death Wish no more...</div><div>Mr. Death said, "He wants me to stay..."</div><div>Because life's a jungle where children must play,</div><div>And our missions in life until our dying day...</div><div>Must be fulfilled before we go to our graves...</div><div>Amen.</div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-35401451555891032842023-10-23T07:12:00.003-07:002023-11-01T15:01:46.737-07:00Bilirubin, the Skin Color of the Sun God (poem)<div><div>Bilirubin is the skin color of the Sun God...</div><div>So surreal to see me in different shades,</div><div>As if the Gods blessed me like blue Krishna,</div><div>Or some Hindu Diety on the rage....</div><div>I look in the mirror in wonder,</div><div>I should be terrified, but I kind of laugh,</div><div>This is life, things could be worse,</div><div>So I laid in my bed to rest,</div><div>Or I could die,</div><div>I saw the Sun God above me,</div><div>Shining with intense bright light...</div><div>He said if death should take me, </div><div>I will be in his heirarchy,</div><div>Merging in the Sun's absolute liquid light...</div><div>So bright, I would become pure energy...</div><div>Then beautiful exotic women did a spiritual dance,</div><div>around my bed.... Praying for my renewal, and recovery...</div><div>They saw my strength and courage,</div><div>My battle against evil...</div><div>I fell like a Spiritual Warrior wounded on the field,</div><div>That's worthy of some love and respect...</div><div>They laid their hands above my body,</div><div>and lifted my being as a prayer to the Gods...</div><div>As if I was in some native tribe,</div><div>Where the women would nurse their wounded men...</div><div>Healing them, </div><div>nursing them back to health,</div><div>and restoring their strength, </div><div>With love, and Spiritual energy...</div><div>My bedroom was flooded with light,</div><div>And optimism filled my brain....</div><div>Transcend the sickness, rise above my sense of mortality,</div><div>Conquer Death, and the fear of the unknown...</div><div>Cheers to the Sun God,</div><div>You are the Sun....</div><div>You are pure light and energy...</div><div>Amen</div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-78117371459008003652023-10-23T07:10:00.002-07:002023-10-23T07:25:59.561-07:00God is a Comedian (poem)<div>I'm sick of being the funny guy, </div><div>What do I get for all my laughs???</div><div>Comedy doesn't pay nowadays...</div><div>You'll never see the flow of money, or cash...</div><div>No one likes the capitalist, </div><div>Nor Do they like the man who hates the coin...</div><div>Money that's free, is money not earned, or held...</div><div>And to make someone laugh is of a valuable concern...</div><div>Take the piss out of him...</div><div>The wise guy, the man who likes to make people laugh...</div><div>They don't like you, if you speak the truth, and also know the math...</div><div>They don't like you, if you're full of reckless abandon,</div><div>Because all they do is want to sneer...</div><div>When you rise to the occasion,</div><div>Cynicism is born out of fear...</div><div>Jealousy, contempt, envy, and greed...</div><div>Christian values tainted by their Godless creeds...</div><div>Nothing they preach matches their evil deeds...</div><div>God is love, joy, and laughter...</div><div>But they condemn, and are full of disaster...</div><div>Murder on their minds, and evil schemes...</div><div>Dirty deeds,</div><div>The spiritual price is steep...</div><div><br></div><div>"God is a comedian,, I've said this before...</div><div>You're life is a comedy, need I say more...</div><div>If you forgot to laugh, when your life is a joke...</div><div>God will abandon you,,</div><div>You miserable bloke...</div><div><br></div><div>We'll see this until the last man stands tall..</div><div>The upright, the confident...</div><div>And the wicked will eventually fall,</div><div>By their own hands...</div><div>They'll burn in hell... </div><div>Suits them well,</div><div>Hell is now,</div><div>Only time will tell...</div><div>You hypocrites...</div><div>Amen</div><div><br></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-36589152412613336322023-10-23T07:06:00.003-07:002023-10-23T07:26:14.605-07:00The Satanic Pseudo Christian (poem)<div><div><div>The day my spirit peeped over the clouds, </div><div>The day my antenna picked up the waves,</div><div>The day the devil walked in my door,</div><div>Uninvited, </div><div>and pissed in my toilet to mark his territory...</div><div>Insulting me in pseudo positive gestures,</div><div>Wearing Jesus on his sleeve,</div><div>Looking at me with eyes of the beast, </div><div>With lust, greed, and jealousy...</div><div>Every visit was a plan, an evil scheme,</div><div>A campaign against the good and Godly,</div><div>Undermining intentions of joy, love, and laughter.</div><div>The devil divides, </div><div>God unites,</div><div>The tenants turned their backs,</div><div>When the lights went out,</div><div>Spiritual murderers, daggers in the dark,</div><div>Forked tongues of deadly silence,</div><div>Tainted bottles of whiskey and poisonous encouragement,</div><div>Turning the wine into bottles of piss, </div><div>Only the devil can do that,</div><div>To turn the fruit of prosperity,</div><div>Into a deadly toxin of poison and mortality...</div><div>It's a craft, a talent the beast has,</div><div>And to be given to his most devout,</div><div>I recognized this, </div><div>And kept my eyes wide open,</div><div>I was on to every move, every step,</div><div>I stumbled and fell,</div><div>I pleaded with the dark angel to stop,</div><div>I confronted him of his crimes...</div><div>I told him who he really was,</div><div>He was possessed with ignorance, </div><div>And egocentric arrogance...</div><div>Stop, I said without words,</div><div>But he would not,</div><div>Your mother will die,</div><div>But he did not...</div><div>His mother died,</div><div>to pay his debt,</div><div>And she did,</div><div>Then I fell by my own hand,</div><div>Without guilt,</div><div>With a bottle in my hand...</div><div>I layeth in bed a rotting corpse,</div><div>But the spirit was with me,</div><div>Walked me through this compentantly...</div><div>As I healed, the terror gone, peace laid up on me...</div><div>A Spiritual renewal... The fiery phoenix,</div><div>Shiva's dance of destruction...</div><div>To be reborn, recreated, revitalized, renewed...</div><div>Lazarus, Resurrected... Reborn,</div><div>I became elevated, with a new sense of being,</div><div>And meaning...</div><div>The war was over...</div><div>But I spoke of murder,</div><div>And then the visitations,</div><div>And the presence of evil,</div><div>Vanished, as quickly as it came,</div><div>Like a passing storm,</div><div>A hurricane,</div><div>Nothing but peace, bowls full fruit, and silence...</div><div>He retreated unto the darkness,</div><div>Whence he came...</div><div>And I saw the sun shining in my window,</div><div>And life and light,</div><div>Entered once more,</div><div>I passed the test,</div><div>To Live once again,</div><div>Amen....</div><div><br></div><div><br></div></div></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-90933802138359578192023-10-23T07:04:00.002-07:002023-10-23T07:26:31.957-07:00The Trap Door (The Alcoholic Binge) ((poem))<div>When life suddenly becomes overwhelmingly difficult,</div><div>When you face, blow after blow,</div><div>Non-stop...</div><div>When the nightmares and horrors never end, </div><div>When problems pile up, unto a crest of a high mountain,</div><div>There is nowhere left to go but downward, spiralling,</div><div>Falling down hard.</div><div>Free falling, but never really touching the ground...</div><div>The suspense, </div><div>The horror show, the endless dark wormhole,</div><div>Pitch black unto the underworld,</div><div>Trap doors into a new reality,</div><div>Down into the dungeon of oblivion,</div><div>Not consciously aware that I even exist...</div><div>Sucking down the poisonous elixer of celebration....</div><div>But what am I celebrating???</div><div>My Death???</div><div>Or the Portal to the next world??</div><div>Self Immolation, Self Destruction, </div><div>Watch in horror as the light dies down, </div><div>The candle snuffed out,</div><div>Spiritual Death,</div><div>The moment I realized something wasn't right,</div><div>Space moths glowed, and fluttered around the room, </div><div>In the darkness, dimly lit with a string of blue Xmas...</div><div>And my hands sent trails of light, trippy, and majestic...</div><div>Sent into a surreal fairyland,</div><div>Where everything was still and peaceful,</div><div>Time stood still,</div><div>And so did my thoughts...</div><div>How and why was I sent here,</div><div>Did the spirits walk me through this, </div><div>into a world that glowed, with animated illuminescence,</div><div>Yet I felt this can't be good...</div><div>This can't be a good thing, </div><div>So numb, but totally lucid, not drunk, but transported...</div><div>This is the end...</div><div>I want to go home,</div><div>Before I never come back,</div><div>So I went to bed....</div><div>And like a dream it became a memory, </div><div>Then it vanished...</div><div>Like an Oasis of emotional refuge....</div><div>Amen...</div><div><br></div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-40167645313033235172019-02-05T05:08:00.003-08:002021-05-12T18:32:03.684-07:00Important Quotes part 2<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh57JfeQnPIiWoh95oG0Lbi2nNeWVmyC-nJpwKDpu7L0WMHnaHbWl2D6tAKHLVqi9qrCNb8pUDSBwbyg2tOe3JwTCKbRV54Ma5-HnSpt13nqqPwbXJYpLVpzY-3iPPqHq4KYSW3mjz4iG4/s577/f3442388517d69bd438ddd4bbfc93406-1.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" height="320" data-original-height="577" data-original-width="433" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh57JfeQnPIiWoh95oG0Lbi2nNeWVmyC-nJpwKDpu7L0WMHnaHbWl2D6tAKHLVqi9qrCNb8pUDSBwbyg2tOe3JwTCKbRV54Ma5-HnSpt13nqqPwbXJYpLVpzY-3iPPqHq4KYSW3mjz4iG4/s320/f3442388517d69bd438ddd4bbfc93406-1.jpg"/></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
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Ephesians 6, 3-4<br />
"Father's do not incite anger in your children by the way you treat them."<br />
<br />
"Honor thy Father and Mother...that is unless they are dishonorable, and their rules oppressive, and unjust."<br />
<br />
"The only reason a child should rebel against their parents, is because they enforce rules that go against the principles of Love and Godliness..."<br />
<br />
"And deliver us from evil. Amen..."<br />
<br />
"When one's actions are pleasing to the Lord even his enemies don't hate him."<br />
<br />
"What does it matter what food you eat..."<br />
<br />
"If one is to know whether they should be married or not, it's better to be free like me, but if one is on fire(lust), one should be married..."<br />
<br />
"When one lies, one murders another part of the world..." ----Merlin from Excalibur<br />
<br />
"An excellent man has no enemies, his friends don't like him..." <br />
----Oscar Wilde<br />
<br />
"I put my genius into my life, and my life into my work..." ------Oscar Wilde<br />
<br />
"When one betrays a person that is true, or is close to God, it won't end well for the betrayer..."<br />
<br />
"When the rich take from the poor, the rich end up in poverty..."<br />
<br />
"You cannot serve God, and Mammon(money) both..."<br />
-----from the movie Pale Rider<br />
<br />
Proverb:<br />
"The house of the wicked shall fall..."<br />
<br />
"Frauds wear God on their sleeve, it's supports their vanity...They use it to gain socially, and politically, whilst corrupting the world around them..."<br />
<br />
"When the community poisons the innocent, the innocent end up poisoning the community..."<br />
<br />
"Repenting is very pleasing to the Lord, but in order to repent, one first must sin..."<br />
-----Rasputin<br />
<br />
"Even though i've learned that even though the soul belongs to God, the flesh belongs to us..."<br />
-------Rasputin<br />
<br />
"Respectable men do not live by their libidos..."<br />
<br />
"When a man relinquishes his control to an irresponsible woman the result is emasculation..."<br />
<br />
"God is a man, after all..."<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-38212084826821744602019-01-16T06:54:00.002-08:002019-03-29T08:58:59.559-07:00Important Quotes and Manifesto by Michael D'Orazio<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
"If you're a humanitarian, and you hurt people who don't support your point of view, then you're not a humanitarian...."</div>
<br />
"Expecting someone to be a humanitarian, when they aren't, is a futile game of fascism and authority...."<br />
<br />
"I won't claim or act like a humanitarian, cuz I'd be lying...and that isn't exactly humanitarian..."<br />
<br />
"Being a humanitarian, is like being a priest... it's a job nobody really wants..."<br />
<br />
"Expecting everyone in this country to be a humanitarian is a fascist ideal, and has way too many expectations..."<br />
<br />
"You chose to act like a humanitarian..now lie in it...don't expect others to do the same...we live how we want..."<br />
<br />
"When humanitarianism becomes oppressive, it's no longer humanitarianism..."<br />
<br />
"G.G.Allin was right... hypocrites of society...he hated that authority...pure genius..."<br />
<br />
"For those people who believe balance is the key... keeping the scales tipped doesn't help anyone... it's hypocrisy"<br />
<br />
"Under the eyes of God I am innocent of my past crimes....but we all have a dark past...it's those people who have that understand."<br />
<br />
"With scars, comes knowledge and experience."<br />
<br />
"A life less dangerous, is a life not worth living."<br />
<br />
"With all good things come bad things. With all bad things come good things. It's called balance."<br />
<br />
"A man dies when the liquor stops pouring, and there is nothing left to celebrate."<br />
<br />
"The worst thing about government handouts is the red tape....Since when does red tape come before charity at church pantries."<br />
<br />
"I appreciate the female form, and prefer a specific body type, but I am not shallow... A healthy body inspires me."<br />
<br />
"The only reason I never did drugs is probably cuz I had no one to do them with, and I couldn't afford them."<br />
<br />
"When Tyrants die, who do nothing more then lie....light breaks, and the sun shines..."<br />
<br />
"When everyone goes away, only God and destiny remains..."<br />
<br />
"The attainment of love is the greatest achievement."<br />
<br />
"Everyone needs a reason to do something, otherwise there is no meaning behind the act."<br />
<br />
"Instead of having a woman, I got a scar... After I got the scar I no longer wanted a woman "<br />
<br />
"Men at a high level, use women in management to demean and take charge of men at the bottom."<br />
<br />
"Those who control the women, have all the power."<br />
<br />
"The Gay community is nothing more then an accepted, glorified concentration camp that includes undesireables."<br />
<br />
"A man who threatens the status quo, will be expelled, for he is a threat...he must be gay..."<br />
<br />
"When one is denied love, it is easy to fall into the hands of degradation."<br />
<br />
"As a man, and an Artist, I believe women are the focus of all that inspires... Lose that focus and all is lost."<br />
<br />
"Men use women to do their dirty work, because no corrupt man will single handedly stand up to a man that is right."<br />
<br />
"The man who is right never loses in the spirit world...for evil rots the soul."<br />
<br />
"When spiritual debts are unpaid, the supernatural forces will first take from your mental health, then your body, and if you die, they will take from the person closest to you."<br />
<br />
"You can't be free until your debts are paid in full, when you owe you will be a slave."<br />
<br />
"The only way to get rid of a taker is to give them what they want, and when you succeed you will never see them again...and in the end they realized they gained nothing."<br />
<br />
"I dream of a day I can build a healthy balanced relationship, but I always test people, and am denied."<br />
<br />
"Jealousy, and envy, are the true destroyers, of relationships, and love... because when one gains another loses."<br />
<br />
"Rewarding a man for evil, and punishing him for doing good, breeds corruption, and is a true crime of humanity."<br />
<br />
"Artists are the true givers of society, but seldom receive anything in return."<br />
<br />
"Undeserved fame always ends in spiritual death, and then physical death usually follows."<br />
<br />
"Being an artist is a huge sacrifice, with very few moments of glory."<br />
<br />
"The true teacher, teaches by setting an example...not enforcing rules, and using propaganda to brainwash them to conform to an ideal..."<br />
<br />
"You can paint a man with a clear conscience as a villian, but in the end your attempt to demonize a good man is futile."<br />
<br />
"Unrequited love is a recipe for suicide."<br />
<br />
"Evil women set traps for loving men. Becareful who you love, if she steals your soul, then you'll end up a casualty..."<br />
<br />
"People who thirst for knowledge with an open mind are easily corrupted"<br />
<br />
"I believe Rasputin really was a "Man of God", but was driven by a karmically dark force to help bring down the Romanovs. He was the catalyst for the destruction of the Russian Dynasty."<br />
<br />
"I also believe that Hitler was hated growing up. The wheels of karma empower demonic forces in those who are targets in society...."<br />
<br />
"When there is something a miss, or something isn't right, all one has to do to seek the truth is look deep underneath it all to find the answers."<br />
<br />
"People pose as humanitarians to cover up their agendas..."<br />
<br />
"If a woman is on birth control, or she asks you to wear a condom most likely she doesn't love you, or better yet she hates your guts."<br />
<br />
"If you are hated and despised do not ask why, cause they really don't need a reason."<br />
<br />
"When you grow beyond people's antics, or their control of you they lose complete interest in you, because it ain't fun anymore."<br />
<br />
"When your not wanted, sex becomes a devisive snare to drag you down further... ask Weinstein..."<br />
<br />
"It ain't over until the fat lady sings, and last man is left standing...that being said, only innocence can hold you up."<br />
<br />
"Sex is sacred. I would never have put out if it wasn't special...there are times I cried, and later regretted..."<br />
<br />
"Maybe being murdered is a high honor... To die for what you believed, and maybe something you said...that seems honorable."<br />
<br />
"My biggest regret was thinking humanity would understand. I gave them my heart and soul, and in return they gave me emotional violence. Things will never be the same again."<br />
<br />
"Defying a tyrant is essential in undermining their stupidity."<br />
<br />
"The early definition of being "Gay" is a colorful, showy personality... The next definition was "a homosexual"... My definition is, "a person who is led to a state of degradation, through oppressive elements."<br />
<br />
"A tyrant was meant to be overthrown, there need to be in control, and their lust for power is their downfall."<br />
<br />
"A tyrant will always fall, cause no man is bigger then the will of God and freedom."<br />
<br />
"Cigarettes don't kill people, it's why you're smoking is what's killing you."<br />
<br />
"To me alcohol is beneficial, it gives me an appetite, helps me sleep, it motivates me to cook, and do things. It also helps me kill time, relax, and clear my head so I can think clearly...So tell me again that it's bad for me"<br />
<br />
"If you ask a stupid person what you should do with your life, they will tell you all the wrong answers."<br />
<br />
"An artist doesn't like to hear advice, they would rather have your support..."<br />
<br />
"People who give advice to struggling Artists, are merely telling them to "Fuck off"...plain and simple.."<br />
<br />
"Liberating the people is the only reason an Artist should become a celebrity... their work should liberate intellectually, sexually, and humanize."<br />
<br />
"If you're a decent person, and people are trying to get something on you, give them what they want...For it will satisfy them that you are not perfect, and then you'll be free of them."<br />
<br />
"The automobile was the worst invention ever to be mass produced...it caused more problems then it was worth...they suck money, kill animals, accidental deaths, and litigation...not to mention it covered the Earth in paved roads and parking lots."<br />
<br />
"Background checks for jobs is just a safegaurd from freedom and liberty, because poverty is the main cause of criminal activity."<br />
<br />
"The judicial system is corrupt, because it incarcerates the victims, and protects<br />
those who are unjust."<br />
<br />
"When in poverty, asking for handouts is no good option, unless they are offered."<br />
<br />
"The left won't accept me, because I say I'm straight, the right won't accept me cause they think I'm gay...so I'm literally caught in the middle, politically that is. I consider myself a moderate, which is a total disadvantage..."<br />
<br />
"The Nazi's bled the color out of Nazi Germany. Humanitarianism is bleeding the color out of America..."<br />
<br />
"Life's a drinking game: You lose, you drink...or do drugs...(end of story)"<br />
<br />
"For everything you lose in life, something is spiritually gained, artistically, and intellectually...there is no exceptions..."<br />
<br />
"True Artists are real freedom fighters..."<br />
<br />
"Real Artists don't do it for the money, really...but when money rolls in it's time to celebrate..."<br />
<br />
"It's okay to steal something if you earned it, and it wasn't given up freely..."<br />
<br />
"When Doctors and Surgeons start doing it soley for the money, you know<br />
You're fucked..."<br />
<br />
"You cannot hold onto something you didn't earn... Everything given to you unearned, must be paid back one way or another..."<br />
<br />
"Celibacy comes when you don't owe anyone a God damned thing..."<br />
<br />
"Cheating in a relationship is essential when the relationship is imbalanced..."<br />
<br />
"Your biggest fears will almost always come true..."<br />
<br />
"When I got scarred I realized I was much more then just a fuck..."<br />
<br />
"The persuit of pleasure always leads to a dead end"<br />
<br />
"A man who is wins has women approach him. A man who is losing approaches women..."<br />
<br />
"Life is a series of contests that go on throughout your life: Win some, lose some..."<br />
<br />
"A friend who is competitive against another friend is no friend at all..."<br />
<br />
"Being poor has nothing to do with how much money you have... it's all about one's attitude towards life... You reap what you sow.... literally..."<br />
<br />
"A perfect body does not mean a perfect soul...Perfection of the spirit is forged on the battlefield resulting in scarred bodies..."<br />
<br />
"A scarred body is a beautiful body..."<br />
<br />
"Ahhh the glorious battlefield...Life isn't worth living until there is a fight to be fought, or cause ...the battlescarred lion is glorious...."<br />
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"An Artist's artistic spirit is all he truly has... Take away that and he is absolutely nothing..."<br />
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"Money, fame, women, equity, finances, and even health come and go, but the human spirit lives on..."<br />
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"Resisting the idea of fame is essential in an Artist's survival..."<br />
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"An Artist's goal isn't fame and fortune... An Artist's true goal is to create, and destroy... and also to get his work done while resisting outside stimuli..."<br />
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"The moral of the Grigori Rasputin story is "Power without responsibility..."<br />
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"Power without responsibility can get you killed..."<br />
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"When you hold your head up high they try to knock you down, when you bow your head in failure a woman will marry you..."<br />
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"Everyone Love's the loser, and everyone hates the winner..."<br />
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"Real cutters and self abusers don't mark their bodies where people can see them... Frauds mark their bodies in noticeable spots to get attention..."<br />
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"Real alcoholics don't want help, they'd rather drink themselves to death in private... Frauds go to AA to become popular, and get attention, cause they usually brag about their excursions..."<br />
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"Suicide attempts are common amongst people who crave attention... If they didn't want attention they'd finish the job..."<br />
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"Most people who are suffering won't talk about it... Those who do are usually lying to get something..."<br />
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"Women will only give you sex when you're not interested... If you want sex they will reject the idea, and tell you "that's all you want..."<br />
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"I told my first girlfriend I wanted more sex, she told me she didn't want the relationship to be all about sex... So she cheated on me five times and told me to my face... Life's full of bittersweet ironies..."<br />
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"Amanda Todd is the Patron Saint of Cyber Bullying... She is a martyr... I think of her always..."<br />
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"Robert Crumb's willingness to survive unutterable rejection is what made him important and famous, his artwork was just a byproduct..."<br />
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"Fear is the biggest enemy and obstacle of progress... If you are stupid enough to ask permission, you most likely will be denied..."<br />
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"Beauty doesn't matter when you're thrown into the pit of the gladiator...flesh gets torn... survive to tell the tale..."<br />
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"Your conscience can destroy you if you wake up and find you spent your whole destroying people's lives..."<br />
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"I do feel I have a lot in common with Beethoven...I mean I'm not a classical composer, but in his eulogy it stated "he gave them everything and got nothing in return, and it's the finest blades that are easily blunted and broken...he turned his back on the world, when people shut him out." That's me to a tee."<br />
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"The truth is when you hate someone, you really love them...cause they have power over your emotions, and that is why you hate them..."<br />
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"When you want to win, all you see is failure..."<br />
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"When you have a birthright, there will be people trying to stop you, persistence will eventually get you there, and claim your prize..."<br />
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"When something special, or sacred is mainstreamed or made open to the public, it is no longer special or sacred..."<br />
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"Lying to someone to their face or behind their back is just another form of Murder...it is Mortal...God help my enemies..."<br />
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"Worrying about your health when your already healthy is a definite mental illness which may lead to self sabotaging your health..."<br />
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"An evil man will accuse an innocent man of that which he is guilty of, but in the end he will be exposed..."<br />
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<br />Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-5657416068434754092018-05-18T08:20:00.001-07:002023-11-01T15:24:31.504-07:00"Autobiography of a Vampire" (an excerpt, by Michael D'Orazio, circa 2017)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEOWtmBxvdW7PdhT-9x4PuehB_HvJCpxOnkPkC8cu6t7dDslkLQGuVu5e_vwm8MOamK30DobbQBkYlVKT6IMi69TaPIl4E149JlKn2FQo5kTqyuTxsA2d6TcDyRxFzUrD4vXUzHChsTUc/s1600/Vampire+book.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1258" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEOWtmBxvdW7PdhT-9x4PuehB_HvJCpxOnkPkC8cu6t7dDslkLQGuVu5e_vwm8MOamK30DobbQBkYlVKT6IMi69TaPIl4E149JlKn2FQo5kTqyuTxsA2d6TcDyRxFzUrD4vXUzHChsTUc/s400/Vampire+book.jpg" width="313"></a></div>
<h3 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><em><br></em></span></h3>
<h3 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><em>Introduction and Commentary...</em>
</span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">It is a very dark night as I travel up the road in
my Chevy Aveo, a car that is slightly artsy in design. I realize that I am privileged in this day in
age, as I drive into a town where men can't afford
a car of their own. Young men litter the streets, smoking cigarettes, asking for single dollar bills, acting as if they are extremely poor. If they are, I don't really know. I am not aware of their situation. They are great actors, trying to squeeze the life, and money out of unsuspecting visitors in town. When they ask, I do not react, I am stone cold, for I am strong in my will, and I have no life energy of my own to sustain others. I feed off their innuendos, and their gestures, and it keeps me alive, for their negative energy fuels my own actions. I am negativity in its whole. I've been in this negative state since I was a young boy: For I was always a loner, and never had friends of my own to feed off of, and become a whole person. If I did, I destroyed what friendship we had. Since I have nothing of my own, I take from others, and when there is nothing left, either they are discarded, or they flee, far away from once we were.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">I am darkness, and I really don't know why. I asked God, why am I different from those people who worship the sun, when I myself am a child of the moon.
I am polar opposites from those people who have snubbed me and rejected me for what ever reason.
I wait on those who find something interesting about me, and bring them in my life. I do my work, and I wonder what this is all about. For my relationships are never constant. They never last beyond a small time frame. For what I give them is knowledge, and money, I give them love, and affection, but what I take from them, is everything that a child is, youth and beauty.
I take their security, and their confidence, and I pick on things that they are sensitive the most. I take their
energy. I absorb it. It lasts for quite a while, until it is snuffed out by other entities who have a vacuum for a soul. In my world, ghouls, witches, phantoms, shadows, vampires, all exist. I live in a very dark world. To some I am strange, I am a mystery. I lurk about in crowds of people, and in the shadows. No one knows I even exist. I could jump out on the middle of the sidewalk, and do a dance and no one would notice me. I do not exist in their world. I am a fully independent entity, roaming the earth in search of another to share, and feed off of. This gives me knowledge, power, imagination, and the most valuable of commodities, youth. I suck the life out of most situations. I can't help it. It is who I am. I will not tell you fully who I am in words, for even I am not sure how to put it all. I am a phantom. I don't exist.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">What I want in this world is to come to some realization about what my real purpose in life is.
I feel as though I am just a social parasite feeding off
the life of others. Is their good in all of this?? I do not know. For under God we are all his creatures. We have a purpose in life, even though humanity picks and chooses what is positive, and good, and what is evil.
A snake for instance, is a symbol of Satan in the bible, a personification of evil, but in nature, just a creature, like everything else. It has its own nature to survive, and its own purpose to live. Just as I. But since I am near poverty on a financial level, independently that is, I cannot run and travel to other places without some financial stability. The modern world is snuffing out entities such as myself. They got smart, and know how to eliminate, dark, and negative personalities from society. Call us mentally ill, call us what you like, it won't stop the darkness from rising in the world. You can suppress the nature of man, and animal. Try to make a lion your friend, but you never know when the nature of the animal will strike when you least expect it. The nature of man is eradicating a specific breed of individual. To take their power and energy away, and manipulate them, until they fall like the sun, on a sunset, and that’s when darkness begins. And this is how it all happens. I was vampirized at a young age, by other kids of whom I grew up with, by my family, by people in the school systems, and those in the mental clinics. They took my life force away from me, the good, the power, and the beauty of youth, although I do not age like other people. I am sustained by the emptiness, and the ever growing possibility that there is something beyond all of this. Is it Death?? or am I already dead?? That is the question. I roam, and I roam for that life force I need to take. It enrages me to see others who thrive, and live lives full of love, and they are happy. But I dare say that it is a controversy for me to actually admit, that happiness, makes you age quicker, because you are content, and full of the cup of life, that God gave you, but when you live your life in the sun, the oxidation of your organic matter breaks down your body, from a scientific stand point. Those who are happy suffer from unexpected tragedies, all the time. But me being a negative entity, A dark God smiles on me. I live outside the world of Karma. I wish evil on those who wish me harm, and have neglected me in the past. Since I can remember when I was a little boy, my aunt who used to do things like humiliate me in front of my other family members during gatherings. I remember this clearly, and even though she is in her later years, and in her decline, she still weaves her web of mischief within the family. She is a witch of sorts. I cannot wait until she is 6 feet underground, and not just her. I want the world to change fully, and completely. I want the whole world to collapse, die out, and totally change. I want to start this world over, so I can begin again. Destruction has a purpose. It is a renewal. This life of man has gotten older, and totally absurd. We don't remember the old ways, the life of the spirit, what lies in the dark, and what true goodness really is. We have forgotten what was really important, what made life worth living. There are too many laws, too many rules. They have refined their crappy system for centuries. They have an answer for everything, but people are still being killed, people are still poor, and things are still going wrong. To me the more that you suppress humanity, or a social class the more it has a tendency to explode. This world is a pressure cooker on the edge of collapse. The only thing you can do is smoke your cigarettes, and drink your beer and wait for it all to go down. Maybe I may have made some bad choices, but once you do something, you have to live with it your whole damn life. It forges you into something you didn't expect, and what it is wouldn't you like to know.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">A dark entity's one desire is to be completed, and full. There is a biological need, or should I say a spiritual debt that one has to complete be for they owe no more to the world. There is a plan, I would like to think that, or a set of stars that guide us to safe haven and deliver us from what I call evil. Now, which brings me on the subject about “Vampires”? Is a vampire evil??? Since Vampires have been known to live off the blood, or the life force of other people, does that make them evil. But because it is in their nature, doesn't that mean there is some good in it all. But if it is in the nature of a man to kill, we consider that evil, and murderous. The modern day vampire may not kill anymore, for fear of the rope, or execution. There are trickier ways of claiming someone's soul, or life force, without putting themselves in a position of incarceration, or penalty: To take without taking, or notice of taking. When you take material possessions from someone that can be proven in a court of law, but when someone takes your soul, or your spirit, there is no law against that. The poor have been victimized by the rich for many years. Slavery still continues in many facets of corporate society, but it is accepted. The spirit and the soul is what keeps someone in a state of beauty and grace. When you take that away from someone, they are a hollow shell, and decline in health. Such is the rich man to take that away from the good common people. But then there are "True Vampires", who take from those who are evil. A vampire can be good if the host is perhaps evil. Vampires are the catalyst for which God does his work. They are the dark force, the wheel of karma that corrects the discrepancies of man and their evil doings. All a vampire needs to do is enter a social class, and let the evil doers do their work, and that is when darkness starts to rise.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">True Modern vampires blend in to normal society hunting for those who are up to no good. They frequent public places watching and waiting for their next victim to arrive. Upon feeding on their victims they are restored temporarily with life giving positive energy. The feeding process takes as long as there is to take from an individual. It could take years, if the host is compliant, and is not aware of what is really happening to them. In the end they might feel depressed, lethargic, with no will to move on, and do things. They might feel a state of desperation upon realizing that the situation that they are in his doing them irreparable harm. Once a vampire has fed on their youth, and beauty, there is hardly a chance of coming back from the experience. Sometimes or in most occasions the host themselves become a vampire, if it has not destroyed their lives. They live in this sort of energy debt, that can't be filled until they find their own hosts to victimize. Victims of vampires are people who have usually put themselves at risk by leaving a flock, or a herd of friends that they are connected with. Once the host leaves their world of friends to perhaps make a better life for themselves, a vampire might arrive to greet them. You see, being alone, and unguarded makes you vulnerable to a vampire attack.
Risking it all by making rash decisions to gain power, in the world makes you a target. Vampires lurk and wait for those individuals. But there are people out there who through no fault of their own are vulnerable, even if they are good, because of the lack of support they have in society. Loneliness might have begun at an early time of their lives. They waited to be seduced by a vampire. The life they had wasn't good enough, so the vampire came and gave them a new life to replace the pain and sorrow they have felt. This represents the making of a good vampire: Vampires who never had the choice, of just being good, or just accepted human beings. In most cases becoming a vampire can be a euphoric and ecstatic experience in the beginning. The wondrous beauty of imagination that new vampires feel can be exciting. But like everything in life if there are no situations to feed on, the vampire might experience dullness, and sort of drift through life feeling nearly dead by the circumstances. It really pays for a vampire to travel. Once an area has been claimed by a vampire, and once there is a realization that a vampire is in their midst, a vampire's cover has been blown. Moving is probably necessary. A vampire has always been given gifts of prophecy, talents, vocations, so they can make money, and be free to explore, and move around. If a vampire gets blacklisted in his community for what ever reason, one has to move on, or start to kill, and steal to make ends meet. Vampires are as vulnerable, as normal people if they are found out. Once people have gained a sense of what is wrong they can out a vampire, and render him harmless to those aware. But vampires must be clever for many reasons.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">A real vampire can't give away who they are. They sometimes look like normal everyday people. But sometimes they are the worst kind. They live this normal reality posing as well adjusted decent people. The only thing is they take from the good, which is a tragedy. They use their evil ways to undermined good hard working people. This is the portrait of a bad vampire. It's not uncommon for vampires of this nature to be punished for doing the work of Satan. Me myself have run into such vampires, and realize nothing good can come of their lives. They steal, they cheat, and they spawn evil in their children.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">There are certain rules a true vampire must operate under: Certain natural laws that a vampire must follow in order to be free from karmic laws: Modern day vampires can live in the sunlight, but it must be avoided because their pale skin is more susceptible to decay. It's not uncommon for a vampire to wear a hat with a brim to block out the sun's rays. Moonlight at night is comforting, and to live in the dark night is even better. The night time is a vampire's favorite time to congregate amongst mortals. Although due to the fact that some regions of the world shut down public business's late at night is somewhat of a travesty for some vampires. Living in a place like New York City, is favorable, since it's the city that never sleeps. Unfortunately some vampires do not have the means to climb up financially due to the social climate, and economy. Vampires like to express themselves in a dark manner, in ways such as Edgar Allen Poe. It's not a cliché. Vampires thrive on dark subjects, their imagination swims in darkness, but also in the beauty of darkness. Real true vampires are rare. There are humans that pose as vampires. But these vampires are mainly well adjusted humans who portray the cliché and the superficial qualities of vampires portrayed in old novels and movies. They aren't real, and have no knowledge of the true qualities a vampire has. It is well known that Goth Subculture emerged in the early eighties, I'm guessing, and spawned the trend, and popularized vampires. Many rock bands dressed up, and crafted their music to become popular. I believe that true vampires emerged during this period to thrive and be accepted in normal society. But that was short lived. In today's society there is a lack of acceptance of vampires, and it’s killing vampire life as we know it.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Because vampires have to be careful, and they are not fully accepted in today's society, coming out is not really a good idea for some. Vampires have another mechanism: Destruction. When they move into a social class, bad things start to happen mysteriously. People die, tragedies, business's close down, Loss of love, car crashes, disease, etc. Like a mouse spreading it's disease to the general public, I would imagine a plague would follow. But the vampire since he is a monster created by the foul deeds of man, are exempt from penalty. Because it wasn't the vampire's work so much, as it was man's work. The damage can never be traced back to the vampire. There is a dark force that surrounds the vampire. It can't be totally explained in words. But when someone crosses a vampire directly, there is always a counter reaction that even the vampire is not aware of. In a way the vampire is innocent of the karmic destruction the vampire inflicts on man. When you try to cause harm to a vampire the reaction is 100 times worse then inflicting it on a normal human being. So if you pick a victim and it happens to be a vampire, something bad will happen to you. Vampires have risen over time from the foul deeds of man. And as they take their blows they become stronger and more powerful. But vampires experience pain when experiencing a blow, and they have to recover like everyone else. But once they bounce back they are to be reckoned with. </span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Vampires move through society with the greatest of ease. There is no where they won’t go, without out risk. There are exceptions, which I will not say, but it is for the vampire to decide what is safe. Sometimes when a vampire frequents an establishment, he will fully work the room until everyone falls prey to his interactions. When there is no one left it is time to leave, and never come back. Vampires gain knowledge and energy from interacting with mortals. They also gain strength and experience. They tend not to make permanent connections with those people, for fear of being found out. There is a lot to risk, if one gets too close. Sometimes a vampire when realized will be outed from certain places they are not welcome. These places are easily ruled out after the vampire realizes who is not easy and willing. Vampires are very fast at what they do, they get what they want, and get the hell out of there. Sometimes a vampire might be caught in something not too good, but they have a sense when trouble is coming. They find people’s behaviors to be extremely predictable. If a vampire should get themselves into something that they can’t get out of, and they are harmed physically, recovery is swift, and the scars pretty much clear up.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Vampires may be dead on the inside, and still, but they are quick, and have endless amounts of negative energy. They practically fly around town, hitting multiple places to find victims every day and every night. There is a lot to know about the nature of vampires. But one would only know if they were a vampire…</span> Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-39412771210954125552018-05-18T08:13:00.002-07:002021-05-12T18:43:02.231-07:00"Vampire in Suburbia" (a story by Michael D'Orazio, circa 2010)<span style="font-size: large;"> My pale skin gives me away as I enter the Inn. They all look with merry faces as they pin the town fool on me. As I walk across the floor to the edge <span style="font-size: large;">of the bar I look around for my next victim.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I play the fool so someone will fall, and I will have my fill. They are all remarkable of low imaginative value. They do not know, that I know that their merry days will end, for the lady they desire will be mine.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> She sits there next to me. She glows with a God given spirit. So much I cannot utter words. Her brilliance blinds me as the wicked men growl at me with murderous contempt.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">“Hello” I say to her. She goes “Hmmmffff”, and looks away. I am beneath her. She is untouchable to me.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I say “Your last boyfriend wasn’t such a snob”. She says,“Who are you anyways?”. (A Dream, I thought, but maybe a nightmare).</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I said gleefully, “That man across the bar you had relations with wants to slit my throat”!! She says coldly, “He will do what I want and what I say. You are a nobody in this town, and will surely not last. You're a pretty boy, but I am sure that there is a man that will have you, and not me”.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I thought that this was a typical answer from the town whore. And as I absorbed her ill talk, her big burly boyfriend came, and asked me to sit in the next bar stool over. In fact I moved to the other side of the bar to diffuse any tension that we had between us. There at the other side I was harassed by the other cronies that were friends of her entourage.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> It’s like me not to run away, and not face the music. I’d rather take the abuse and learn from it than not know what’s around the corner. In fact I don’t believe in karma, for I cant hurt a fly. I get hurt sometimes, and this makes me think. What is my destination? Will I end up in a wheelchair when I get real old, or will I be in optimum shape when my time comes. Who knows? Will I live 200 more years If I believe and desire to live on, and see if we survive on this god forsaken planet.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I lived for 100 years, and I look like I am 26. For that was the age I was brought into darkness. And I still know very little about human existence. For I am not a human anymore. That was a short time, and during that time I learned very little except suffering and dismay.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> My new existence was given to me as a consolation for not knowing how to live life. I stumbled upon an infected teen who wanted me for his own. He lured me with his affections, and his smooth talk. He made me feel like I belonged, and that I was needed. We were together always, until that fateful day when he uttered words that murdered our trust. Him and a few others stole my light, and my soul, and it was replaced with a malignant spirit that guided me into malevolence.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> Ever since those days I have been driven by worldly ambitions, to replace the love that was taken from me and lost. Now I am no better than a beggar in the streets, looking for emotional handouts from strangers. I have been in a state of agitation with little vital energy to sustain me. Now I suck the life force out of the people closest to me. I live in a whirlpool of negativity, that begins with my family, and sucks everything from it’s surrounding environments.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I am not sure if I am a pawn, or my intelligence is making vital decisions in my life that will guide me in the right direction.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> There was a time that I summoned a spirit to carry me, and deliver me from evil influences. For I am a pure being, but what I project and materialize in space is darkness.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I am the illusion of a dark being, secretive, and evasive. I can only enter the life of another when I am invited. But when I am, I drag their souls down, and make them one of mine own. Some stay and bond with me, others run and use their power against me. There is no way I can’t catch something when I weave my web. But mostly I walk alone for I am doomed by God to face the world in solitude. I am not welcome anywhere, but frequent places of debauchery for comfort. "I believe there is nothing more delicious than the soul of an evil man, or woman."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">(Last line adopted from "Interview with a Vampire", by Anne Rice)</span><br />
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<br />Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-25418485844612951402018-05-18T08:04:00.003-07:002021-05-12T18:52:05.506-07:00"The Happy Land of Emasculation" (a Short Story by Michael D'Orazio)<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSB9XNtkDrZrkSnY9zpDoR_9zeQLzZEmT_FcyQ77I0jj5QFMBp8z52OzXQVsvwtBdcAzbBUsAJJwHDOl-vTttcZ-udMAjO20WW-ml_IEEifo6aRoqWhucHR2lP4A-BXmfnC8HvCJqwVW0/s640/_108388291_fullpicbbc.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="360" data-original-width="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSB9XNtkDrZrkSnY9zpDoR_9zeQLzZEmT_FcyQ77I0jj5QFMBp8z52OzXQVsvwtBdcAzbBUsAJJwHDOl-vTttcZ-udMAjO20WW-ml_IEEifo6aRoqWhucHR2lP4A-BXmfnC8HvCJqwVW0/s320/_108388291_fullpicbbc.jpg"/></a></div><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">(This story was based on a dream I had the night before I wrote it.)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> When I woke up I was in the back of a Range Rover, my anus was sore, and these two people were bringing me to a place, apparently against my will.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> It was when I woke up that I realized that these two people were leading me around, <span style="font-size: large;">I didn't know them, but I trusted that they were going to bring me somewhere interesting, and what it was, it turned out to be a surreal fairyland(nightmare).</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> We rode through the countryside. We viewed country neighborhoods, with people all working together, seemingly perfectly happy. It seemed like a happy land, but who were these people. They all seemed connected. It seemed alien to me. When we got to where we were going it seemed like some sort of folk fest, with merchants and booths, jugglers, and lots of food. There were men dressed like happy clowns, and some like drag queens. The men were with men, and the women who had a butch appeal were with women just a little cuter. I was confused why I was brought here, and I got a little paranoid.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> What town was this? What state was I in. The two people that brought me here seemed like a normal straight couple. They had a huge pick up truck. The man was grungy, like he worked outside most of his life, or maybe he was a hardcore alcoholic, who maybe smoked too much weed, and dug ditches for a living out in the sweltering heat. The woman, you could tell she was pretty herself once, but life toughened her up. You could tell that she was the type to stand by her man. They were in league with this organization, bringing undesirables, or failures to this world, to blend, and fit in.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I got scared, and paranoid, and the first thing I checked was my anus, to see if I was violated in anyway. And in my horror, I found sticky jizz oozing from my ass. I couldn't believe this. My biggest fear had come true. I asked myself who did this to me, and who brought me here??</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> The couple brought me to the person responsible for this(the person who had me violated), and who it was, was not surprising. It was my girlfriend of four years. She looked the same as I remembered her, but different at the same time. She wasn't the person that I came to know. She was deceptive, and deceitful... She betrayed me, and she was showing here true inner light.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> She looked at me like nothing had happened, and like she never saw me before. I remember that in our past relationship that she always made jokes, or perhaps attacked my masculinity in some ways that made me anxious, or made me mistrust her judgments. After all, I tried my best to be the man in our relationship, but she wore the pants in a way that I didn't like. I didn't want a woman to be in control my destiny, and in the end she brought me here anyways.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> She walked away with out a care, and I just looked around, scared that I was going to contract A.I.D.S, from the gooey jizz that was still oozing out of my ass.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I wondered how I was going to get home, and who was willing to take me. No one really showed any interest in helping me, treating me like I was just a number.</span><div><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> The sun was shining regardless, to my dismay. This place was like a fairyland, but to me it was a facade of something sicker. This is when I woke up from this dream. It made perfect sense to me. It summoned up years of abuse, but now that I know this will it all stop.(Probably not)</span><br />
<br /><br />
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<div class="separator" style="border-image: none 100% / 1 / 0 stretch; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
</div>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-49369425749501490402018-05-18T07:56:00.005-07:002021-05-12T18:50:40.008-07:00The Spider's Delight.... (a Short Story by Michael D'Orazio)<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif5Rl-dxFbeINfm6bqlxF5iqFwpNMbfnE0Lepv0fp_YvqmYl4xNQnGOnFqM4N-_r4I1KeMv4P_YI6_BwUxeeuFMvP29XUKtJM55kxog0WjNBCtvj31GEM7aQVLwwu6P9dle4RFifnss4A/s299/Garden8.gif" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="205" data-original-width="299" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif5Rl-dxFbeINfm6bqlxF5iqFwpNMbfnE0Lepv0fp_YvqmYl4xNQnGOnFqM4N-_r4I1KeMv4P_YI6_BwUxeeuFMvP29XUKtJM55kxog0WjNBCtvj31GEM7aQVLwwu6P9dle4RFifnss4A/s320/Garden8.gif"/></a></div><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"> (This story was based on a Dream I had in 2010)</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"> <span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"> There once was a boy that walked through the field's one
day. He sat by a tree reading the newest bestselling novel, when a spider spun
it's web downward resting itself on the hand of the boy. It said to him
quietly, "I want sweets!!"</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">"But you eat bugs", said the boy. The spider said,
"I'm tired of eating the same old things. Bugs all taste the same to me. I
want sweet things."</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">So after dark, the boy went into town to find a candy store
that was still open for business. He stopped at a bar to check out this latest
club that had just opened up. It was dark in there, with a man playing a
menacing piano in the corner wearing a black tuxedo.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">"Do you mind if I have a cocktail before we stop at the
candy store", the boy said. The spider responded, "I guess so".
So the boy sat down at the bar with the spider on his shoulder, and ordered a
Manhattan, with sweet vermouth. He told the spider to have a sip, to satisfy
him until the stopped at the candy store. The spider did take a sip, making him
feel a little intoxicated.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">The boy consumed the high priced elixir, whilst he admired
the chilling sonata that was being played by the grim, pale, grey haired musician
that sat at the piano. His tip jar was full of big bills. The boy didn't tip,
because he didn't have any more ones.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">The light in the room was filled with dim blue lights. All
of the patrons there looked like vampires, drinking red wine, and wearing high
priced black clothes, that were designed by big names.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">After the boy took his last sip of the drink, he gave the
cherry to the spider, and made his way to the candy shop, that was located just
around the corner.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">The store had just closed as the boy walked to the front
door. All the candy that was displayed in the window, glistened, as the drunken
spider relished himself into the beautiful imagery that was presented. The
spider lost control of his senses, and demanded that he have the candy.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">"Throw a rock at the window", the spider
demanded.. The boy, easily influenced, grabbed a broken half-piece of brick
that was lying on the sidewalk, and thought twice about what he was going to
do, and looked both ways to see if anyone was coming. He took a deep breath,
and half-heartedly threw the brick, through the glass window pain, exposing the
delicious delights, that lay there enticing the spider's drooling mouth.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">The spider ran, danced, flew across the arm of the boy,
which bridged the gap between the boy, and the chocolates. The spider danced
with glee, as the candy grew closer, and closer.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">The spider, drunk, and in state of ecstasy, or frustrated
anxiety, lifted his head high, with his many eyes closed, opened his mouth, and
was going to take a huge chunk out of the creamy looking chocolate truffle that
lay at the edge of the boys finger tips, and instead took a chunk out of the
boys hand accidentally. The boy screamed in agony and smushed the spider all
over his fingers, making sure that the spider was dead, and no longer able to
hurt him.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">The poison from the spider bite exploded some of the skin
off his hand, and fell off. His fingers cramped, and contorted, as the boy
cried to himself in horror. "What a travesty", he said to himself,
and walked home in a state of misery, back to his mother's arms.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">His mother was horrified by the look of the boy's hand, and
put methylate, the red colored ointment on the exposed skin, and bandaged it.
The boy went to bed, and dreamt of better things, </span><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="_GoBack"></a><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">sugar
plums, and all that nonsense. </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">His mother opened the door of his room, and asked him while
he was sound asleep, with the lights off, and said, "What's that alcohol
doing on your breath"???</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; font-size: large;">The End </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri"; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;">M.D</span></span><br />
<br /><br />
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<br />Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-27302925354937602182018-05-16T05:47:00.002-07:002018-05-18T13:51:42.293-07:00Is Political Correctness Fascism???....(Quotes by Michael D'Orazio)Just added this to my ABOUT page on my website....I will talk soon more about POLITICAL CORRECTNESS, and it's pitfalls....<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">(To Begin....Michael's SOLE PURPOSE is to fight against POLITICAL CORRECTNESS, and the people who GOVERN this THOUGHT POLICE... POLITICAL CORRECTNESS is a THREAT to your 1st AMENDMENT RIGHTS, and also it is a THREAT to ART, and LITERATURE... Also, it is a form of MIND CONTROL, forcing you to be OBEDIENT. It's a form of MENTAL SLAVERY, and SUBMISSION.... You do not have to be POLITICALLY INCORRECT to notice that, if people cannot CONTROL your MIND, you will be PENALIZED, PUNISHED socially, and in some cases OSTRACIZED.... POLITICAL CORRECTNESS is a THREAT, and should therefore be RESISTED....to preserve and EMANCIPATE yourself from MENTAL SUBJAGATION...) ---M.D.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The reason why Political Correctness is a threat to the older</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">generations, is simply because you can't teach "Old Dogs New Tricks", literally... I mean everything I learned and know as a middle aged man, is now being overturned, threatened, and broken, which ultimately is a threat to my whole psychic framework...Simply changing the fabric of my mind to conform to</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">an idiotic, and oppressive language as PC, is easier said then done...</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I am being blamed literally for the subjugation of oppressed black people, cripples, retards, and touchy Semitic semantics, because Rich Liberal Fucks, had to change the language to insult people's intelligence, and intentions. Changing our language to PC, is like telling me I can't use English anymore, and to learn another language in order to survive...Fuck that!!!.... I mean the freedom to choose our words, and not have to walk on eggshells, is the difference between being happy, and miserable. Telling me to change my language, which should be my choice, is an oppressive stance to take, for the sake of perhaps hurting sensitive people, who know nothing about transcendence, or what it means to compromise the freedom to speak openly and freely....It's your choice really to accept this stupidity, or allow it to get more, and more tedious, or complicated. I say RESIST...."</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="UFICommentBody"><span style="font-size: large;">"Political correctness isnt just about slurs, or offensive lauguage its about communicating ideas that are real, true, or criticisms that may affect a class of people who take little responsibility or inflict injustices that affect all of society. With PC language, checks and balances are jeopardized, or compromised"</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">(on being both liberal and libertarian)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">" It's possible to accepting of new ideas and also discarding new<br />useless ideas like Political Correctness. As an artist i am liberal but in the idea of free speech i am old school so that is where the libertarian comes in or perhaps the conservative bigot i may be for racially profiling people even though i inturn am not racist. I take from all political groups, and make my own religion in politics. I am moderate because of this.. I'm not radicalized on the right or left."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">(on PC and literature)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">"<u>Gone with the Wind</u>, came at a time when PC language, was not instituted. It's a commentary on American history, which based itself on the truths of that time period. Regardless, reality, and truth hurts, or reminds people of just how it use to be back then.... PC language, and it's fundamentals threatens to destroy literary classics, and limit the free speech of historians and writers of this day, and age... That is, if they are strong enough to not let it influence their work, so they can adhere to truthful principles.,, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">As an Artist I try to be non-biased in <span style="font-size: large;">my opinions, but facts remain, descriptions remain, and I find that under the influence of todays restrictions I find myself in a <span style="font-size: large;">constant state of deep Rebellion..."</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">(On the argument of Slavery...)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">"First of all the African slaves were enslaved by their own people,<br />then sold to white traders then shipped to North America where they were chained and shackled. I stress that white people did not invent the concept of slavery... Slavery dated back to Ancient times, and even the Egyptians who were considered colored, or Black, did in fact enslave the Jews. And of course later white people from the north, under the influence of Liberal Leader Abraham Lincoln, freed the slaves in the South during the Civil War. Even so, it seems that all white people, and I mean all, are being blamed and left with the stigma of having been responsible for the slavery of what they then called "Negroes"... <span style="font-size: large;">Most white people have absolutely no connections, or lineage, that may make them culpable, or responsible for what has happened in the past, I know that there are people who still carry the confederate flag, and still hate the color of a black person's skin...But white people who aren't to blame, carry the stigma and guilt, or the pain of having to bear that they may be karmically responsible just because they are white... Jesus said, "Break the Chain of Evil", but for some reason there is no forgiveness, or no ending of the madness that yesterday was not so savory, etc..... But besides that one race can't be responsible for the invention of slavery, Slavery existed everywhere in the world in different times in history."</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">(Questions....)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">"Is Political Correctness, a dumbed down use of language for liberals to make people feel better about their shortcomings."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: large;">"Are Liberals in high places accused of creating a language that seemed to have good intentions in the beginning but later<br />became so extreme it limited free speech, and affected the<br />people who are forced to curb their expressive ideas, vocalize their frustrations, and deliberately censor their use of language, only to go lighter on those whom the language seemed to target."</span>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-70161457550436326702018-05-05T09:45:00.000-07:002018-05-05T14:48:08.389-07:00Nick Cave, BDS, and his shows in Tel Aviv, Israel...<span style="font-size: large;">Even though I consider myself a huge fan of Nick Cave's work, especially since he inspired most of my music and art for some 25 odd years, and I find his work to be truly inspiring, and even cutting edge... I definitely have a problem with him justifying his shows in Tel Aviv last year.... Roger Waters, Brian Eno, and other BDS(Boycott, Divestments, and Sanctions)activists including Palestinian Artists who belong to the cause urged Nick Cave to sign a list, boycotting Artists playing shows in Tel Aviv, Israel due to their treatment, and silencing of Palestinian Artists, and containing Gaza with border walls, and oppressing Palestinians for 5 decades, while investing in Hasbara(making them look good regardless, of the subjugation of Palestinians, and internal corruption growing in Israel etc).... </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Nick Cave made up some bullshit excuse, for doing two sold out shows in Tel Aviv, saying something about being silenced, or bullied by Artists like Roger Waters,, and other activists (who are trying to establish a peaceful protest against Israeli rule of Palestinians), yet Nick Cave refuses to acknowledge the Palestinians being bullied and silenced, etc... I thought about this a lot due to my loyalty to Nick Cave, and his work... I thought a lot about it carefully... Weighed the facts, looked at both sides, and the conclusion I have come up with is that he is totally, and unutterably full of shit, for making up some lame ass excuse for playing Israel.... Roger Waters is right, and I am not even a fan of Pink Floyd, but he is right...Nick Cave is standing with the oppressor, disregarding human rights, and bypassing his morality for the sake of his career. I can see Nick Cave's point in some ways though, his decision to play Tel Aviv, was an act of rebellion against being told what to do, and what not to do...But Nick, only a weak minded fool plays that game. I lost total respect for you.... As a huge believer in what he has done with his work, his decision to play Tel Aviv, was a huge disappointment to me.... Because Israel's influence over the Palestinians permeates throughout the whole world... If Israel is oppressive in Israel they are oppressive around the world, and we are all affected.... Zionism has a dark side.... especially me not being a Jew that is.....</span>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-80034217526712302232018-05-05T08:49:00.000-07:002018-05-18T14:57:46.498-07:00On Syd Barrett.... (the Biographies)<span style="font-size: large;">It's in my opinion that the whole Syd Barrett story is horse shit.<br /> It just doesn't add up. And without Syd Barrett's point of view the<br /> whole story is totally incomplete. "Vegetable Man", the song wasn't about Syd himself like they said. It was about a generation of hipsters who were drugged out social drop outs that had little<br />or no brains, to justify their own lifestyles. "Vegetable Man" was purely antagonistic, and the whole purpose was to speak to all those late sixties hipster druggies who thought they were real cool, and modern, even though their path was futile, destructive and perhaps vain... They wouldn't tell you that in Syd's biographies because it was their little secret not to give away any information<br />that would entice people, or artists to know what makes a song intensely influencial, or just a prank, or a bad joke. The joke's on you, and you don't even get it... Regardless that Pink Floyd dressed like their fan base(to mostly attract, and lure a highly influenced, easily molded type of character such as a hipster), but were smart enough not to get into the drugs, which ultimately secured their success's as Rock Stars... <br />Obviously. Why they lied in his biographies was just<br />to make Syd out to be more interesting then he actually was, and his contributions were so small that to say he was a genius was to overestimate his prowess and contribute to him just being a commercial product. Although his solo work is fashionable, and well put together... I feel as though it says less logically, then most artist's work, and is more fragmented lyrically...<br />It doesn't communicate clear ideas. It's more abstract, and illustrative, but doesn't speak deep lyrical meanings with a sort of clear logic... Maybe he was truly schizophrenic...</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Yes "Vegetable Man" was just poking fun, and Syd bit off more</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">then he could chew... He took on too much too soon... The pressure</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">and stress obviously took it's toll, and he medicated with drugs, while being accompanied by crazy hanger-on's, slipping LSD into his morning coffee... I can only imagine what jealous people can do to a very delicate, fragile individual under a lot of stress... He had too much...Too much talent, style, good looks, and ability for anyone to totally not be contemptuously jealous... You can look at it from 20 different angles what was the real cause of his breakdown, because there were several reasons... But no matter how many books you read about Syd to try to find the answers you will always still have a question mark, because without Syd's side of the story, or point of view, we will never really know, only from an outside perspective, which makes this subject perplexing... Syd was broken... too broken to have fought back, and told his side of the story... and in the end, his best way of handling the situation was to escape, disconnect, retreat, and just get away from all those people who suffocated him with questions, and put pressure on him to come up with a new hit single, or perhaps material that could make the record companies money...</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> I do believe Syd was a true Artist from what I read... he was not about commercialism, and definitely when Pink Floyd sold out to the commercial world, it bothered him... I keep telling myself that if Syd Barrett had the home recording devices we have now, he could have kept producing albums in the privacy of his own home at his own pace, experimenting...but the pressure of having to go to a real studio and work out ideas was too risky and too costly... I believe he wouldn't have ended up being such a casualty if there was an opportunity to pick up the pieces... </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> Back to the early days when he wrote "See Emily Play"...I asked some people what they thought that song meant... They always say "Tripping"... Well if you should know it's real meaning is about the mind games that women play... "Emily tries but misunderstands, she's often inclined to borrow somebodies dreams 'til tomorrow"...Which ultimately means she takes advantage of people who she's with..... "Let's try it another way, you'll lose your mind to play"... means the tables are being turned....</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">"Gazing in tree's in sorrow hardly a sound 'til tomorrow"... meaning she's sad due to the consequences of her actions... "Put on a gown that touches the ground", says she should be more modest, and "Float on the river forever and ever Emily"... meaning the protagonist of whom she's playing games wishes her dead after her downfall.... Such a Dark song... but a psychedelic pop song..... Syd was dark no doubt... There was underlying themes that really showed he was in fact a precursor to the whole Goth movement later, I am sure he had some sort of impact on later post punk bands.... </span>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3836558334466553292.post-54926966045182653552017-08-22T16:51:00.004-07:002018-05-05T15:08:35.848-07:00Michael D'Orazio Interview 2017 Anti-Pop Records (a Fake interview, with truthful responses)<span style="font-size: large;">This is Larry Heartfeld here from Anti-Pop Records here to interview Michael D'Orazio, He's been a veteran here at Anti-Pop records for probably 3 solid ground breaking years...Before that he was signed to Sunrise Records from 2004 to 2010.... It was 2015, when he started to break new ground on his recordings, and it was the beginning of a long string of albums, that catapulted him into a successful romp of new ideas and concepts... There is no genre for what he does, he doesn't follow trends but is more inspired by the early eighties underground, such as post punk, or perhaps even goth. He wanted me to do this interview, because he wants people to know certain aspects of his personality, and creative processes. An interview was long overdue concerning his quest for creative dominance, and perhaps his mental inconsistencies that trouble him on a daily basis... So here it is...(Michael sits down with a cup of espresso he made from a stand up pot, we are sitting in his well decorated kitchen, with Xmas lights decorating the walls. It's almost like an outdoor Café, with fake plants in the corner. It's a relatively hot day, with the sun going down, and a cool breeze flowing through three consecutive windows, that are a nice view of the street, and the building next door..)</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "So let me get straight to the point Michael, do you hate Jews????"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "No I don't hate anyone, why do you ask??"</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Because it seems you have done some work in the past that might have been construed</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">as Anti-Semitic."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Well it all started when I did this song called "Burning Out" when I was 21 years old, and the first lyric of the song said "My Honey needs more money and my Honey she's a Jew". When I wrote that lyric I wasn't aware what I was doing and it wasn't until my producers brought it to my attention that it was "Politically Incorrect"...Back in those days Politically incorrect was still in, and you pretty much could say anything without reprimand... But after they took those tapes, and whisked them away without giving me proper copies I got "Jew Paranoid".... I started to rebel against this politically Correct bullshit, and took it to the next level, out of outrage, and resentment. In other words they made me worse then I was... I keep telling myself that the lyric was no worse then what Robert Crumb did in his comics, poke fun at stereotypes, satirically. Stereotypes that were drilled in my head during my early years by people who tried to pit me against, or stir up trouble with a Jewish friend I had back in those days. There was always this thing about Jew's and Money... Nothing new, after all I didn't start it.."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "That would explain why you did the comic "Hitler wanted to be an Artist, didn't you know"..</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Yes, exactly, I dared myself to do it. Then I put it into my book "Trixie, the Schizophrenic Girl", and I distributed it locally, to see what kind of effect the stories had on people. To make them see a much darker, or controversial aspect of art and comics that they weren't used to seeing, or experiencing..."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "And then what happened???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "I'm not quite sure, really, it was mixed. I would say though I experienced, some hostility, some exclusion, maybe some types of deception from people who thought perhaps I was arrogant or bigoted for doing that kind of work... No one came out openly though and addressed the issue in a sensible or humane way. It was mostly just a type of backlash, that may have caused some emotional and physical violence, I didn't expect. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "So you got beat up, and abused??"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "In most cases yes, I did experience some physical violence, on a few occasions. They sure taught me a lesson, now I can't really show my face around a particular town that I frequented. I still go there, just don't hang out there all the time. I have to watch who I run into....These people don't forget. "</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Ok, let's change the topic, because it seems so ugly of a situation...Let's talk about what your doing now, instead of the past, what have you truly been up to since your horrific situation, and since you moved on..."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Well due to all the hostility, I dropped out of the local scenes, and started to knuckle down, especially since I got this apartment through a program I was in...I was in jail for 8 months after an assault charge, that was reduced to 2 misdemeanors. I don't really want to say openly what I did, but I was mentally ill, and off my medication when things went down.. All the abuse I took from people in society, and all the harassment, made my life spiral out of control. When I got out of jail, I was pretty much inactive for two years, solely working on my cooking skills, I only did two albums, that were extremely depressing in nature. They had artistic merit, but I really don't push those albums at all. After two years in late 2014, I started to feel energized. I started to plug out acoustic albums, then in 2015 I bought new equipment, including a multi-track recorder, and a nice keyboard workstation, and I started to do more commercially acceptable albums utilizing many overdubs to get the desired effect. 2015 was just the beginning though, It only progressed from there"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Do you still perform live in public"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Absolutely not, I did my last set of live recording at a coffeeshop in Norristown, Pa. And the harassment started all over again... I did the open mics for 12 weeks straight trying to record the sessions, but I ran into trouble there also..."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "What happened???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "The people who ran the coffeeshop, and the people who hosted were aware that I was recording the sessions. People who came in were trying to ruin the recordings by making loud noises. If you listen to the Jus Java Recordings you'd realize that the guy who came in the coffee shop on one tracks was speaking intentionally loud, and to obscure the music on the recording, Among other things. Like the barista banging on the espresso machine, the salt shaker being slammed on the table, and also some lady banging her chair on the ground curiously. The last straw was when this girl Maria kept trying to bum cigarettes, host was out sick, the owner was rearranging the seating in a fucked up way, and the barista was serving me half cups of coffee...Among other things. I realized I wasn't going to get anywhere with these people. The owner came to the bar a couple of times and told me that everytime I never showed up, it was crowded, just to get my goat, and told me that "But your music is Dark"... They did there best to try to get me angry, but I have my threshold for bullshit so I stopped attending. That coffeeshop closed shortly after, thankfully. It was a nuisance... This happened in 2015.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "This isn't the first time you had trouble at a venue before, didn't you say..."</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Yes I had trouble at Chaplin's Music Café in Spring City, Pa. I was introduced to the venue by an acquaintance to support the venue. I believe It was owned by a Guy named Lee, at the time, and back in those days all was well. But then ownership changed after a few years, and people who I don't care to mention, had there sons, manage the place. I used to hang my artwork up there but this guy named Liam kept fucking with my artwork, and blaming it on people who came to the venue. Obviously it was him. On two occasions my artwork was dismantled, and stolen, and then he leaned a ladder directly on the glass of one of my pieces while I was there, and then one of my prized pieces which had a new homemade frame had books piled high on top of it when I asked him "When he was going to hang it"... He also called me "Gay" on a few occasions, and would fuck up any chance I had to have a show... I only did three shows at Chaplin's. The first was a brilliant performance that was recorded, but the sound guy James split the tracks in the wrong places when he mastered it. The second show a truly a disaster resulting in a depressing performance, and the third show went well, but James just forgot to record the first song, he said by accident...I had to pay full price for them to release it to me. I went back and had to edit the recordings so the tracks were split right. And that was a pain in the ass....I left Chaplin's for a while back in 2010, and didn't come back until after I got out of Jail. I tried to get a show, being things changed, but the young manager Chris told me "Sure we like to give shows to people just starting out", So after that I never, ever went back to that venue...</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">One of the straws that broke the camels back before that was some old guy, an owner, Dennis who is actually a Deacon of a Church, called me "Gay", criticized my work, and said something like "I Love what you did for the Place", Sarcastically speaking...I know what he meant. After all the bullshit I dealt with Chaplin's I will never go back there even if I was a huge success...."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "That's Fucking horrible, and terribly unprofessional"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "You got that right. There were other places I had horrible experiences, but through time as I progressed creatively it got worse, and worse. Steel City coffee house never offered me a show, so I never asked. I was kind of insulted being I supported that place for a decade or so. I used to go there all the time, but I was just a shadow, unnoticed, ignored. I wasn't impressed much by that place anyways. Their taste in music and culture was totally boring...That and also there was the clique factor...I think it was a Jewish owned venue, so go figure, I'm the fucking enemy, which also inspired "Hitler wanted to be an Artist". It always comes back to the Jew's don't you know"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Ha, ha, ha"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "It seems there is a thin line between Freedom of Speech, and Political Correctness"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "So you stopped performing, and now you consigned yourself to just being a recording artist".</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Yes, I find it exhausting to be in the public eye with with the general social climate all being </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">assholes. I mean in the past there were always problems, but I find that things got worse. People are miserable. I have to lie about how I feel in public, because If I let people know how contented, or happy I am, they sort of punish me for it. I can't be honest with people. I paint a picture so black about my life, so people will adopt a more sympathetic, or more empathetic approach to me socially. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I am honest about my lying, I think it stems from my mental illness, that is progressively getting worse. I blame my illness, not just on my chemistry, but also my experiences with people. I realize that there are concrete environmental factors that contributed to my illness..."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Are you becoming much more reclusive these days???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Yes, indeed. I think reading all those Syd Barrett biographies isn't helping, ha ha. My interest</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">in Syd Barrett came at a time when my own illness, contributed to my own social evasiveness. Syd Barrett retreated into sort of a seclusion, probably into his own fantasy world in order to protect his sanity... I myself live in my imagination mostly, because of the hurt I feel, inflicted on me by people who go out of there way to show me that all my attempts at forging a life that is somewhat special is in vain... Frankly, I can't take it anymore... I don't know if it's just me, but coming out in the open these days is so risky, and painful, that I am reluctant, fearing that my mental health will decline much more rapidly. My imagination though does fuel my creative drive. It also gives me hope, and I live somewhat in my dreams... Reality is a dream stealer, don't you agree!!"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Did you always live in your imagination???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "I think so. I guess that is why most things when I was young, or traumas never mattered or bothered me much. My sister thinks I have Asperger's Syndrome to explain my mental condition, but it's hard for me to decipher what the real truth about my diagnosis is. My upbringing was very tumultuous, and very chaotic... My parents were very harsh, which made me a sort of tough character regardless of how people perceive me. My father always encouraged my creative, constructive side, buying me legos, and erector sets. He wanted me to learn how to build things, him being a carpenter and such. But he did not encourage me musically, telling that he wouldn't buy me a guitar when I was young cause he thought I would never use it. There was a lot of reverse psychology that made me pursue the things my parents never thought was imaginable, which was to be an actual successful musician. My idea of being a music, or rock star, was blown way out of proportion. I looked at Rock stars like Gods, or something more extraordinary, not realizing you can just make an honest living doing it.... "</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "I think that is most young musicians to look at Rock Stars as something much, much more... That is why they look up to them as some sort of role model".</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Except for all the drug taking, that is. I can't do drugs, I am already too mental, and struggle everyday day with my illness. I can't afford to risk my health and sanity, especially financially. I am low income, and on disability, which is another social stigma... I mean I worked for 24 years doing mostly menial labor, and I ended up on social security, because my ability to hold scheduled jobs deteriorated. Anyways I find Rock-n-Roll biographies to be bad influences, somewhat misguiding, even if they are partially true. They exaggerate all the aspects of the stars life, into mere legend. No one could live up to how they portray a Rock Star. I mean I know I couldn't... And with all the dead rock stars lying around these days, who would want to be a rock star especially in America... All the drugs, and suicides, or even perhaps murders. Being a celebrity, or development into a personality always has risks. Jealousy doesn't help relationships. I found the more I achieved the more alienated I got. That's the downside".</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Did you ever think about writing an autobiography???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "I think about writing an autobiography all the time, but I am constantly processing facts and information. My mind is saturated with ideas concerning my life. It's overwhelming... I wrote an early memoir about my growing up and being in my second band "The Burning". It was called "Evil: the Rise and Fall of the Burning". It painted me as this probably below average guy, who ended up</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">with an opportunity to be something more. It was an honest account of my early experiences with being in bands, replete with photographs. The Burning was my center piece, my initial inspiration to continue on my musical journey. I tried later to recapture the magic, but ended up doing something a little more different. I tried to put the post punk into my acoustic music, or bring gloom into the local acoustic scene which I did. But me doing the wrong thing at the right time didn't work out so well. Everyone is doing all this positive commercial crap at the venues... totally puts me off.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Kind of reminds me of how the Nazi's instituted "Positive Cabaret" into Cabaret's in Nazi Germany in the 1930's, in order to eliminate any sort of political commentaries, that might went against Nazi political agendas... "</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Wow you thought that up yourself???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Yeah, Nazism in America doesn't exactly wear Swastikas, it's more subtle now.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "That's frightening to think about".</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Yes, it is, in fact Ronald Reagan said in an interview that if Fascism manifests itself in America it will come from Liberalism. All these Liberals are fighting fascism, not knowing, or being informed, that fascism actually comes from forms of Liberalism. Look it up. Look up "Liberal Fascism on Google, ha ha. But you have Nazism from the Alt Right, and Fascism from the Alt Left. That is why I don't take either side. I am independent politically, although I lean more toward the Right in some ways..."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Even though your on Disability do you still work hard on your Craft???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Yes, in fact the transition from working jobs to full time artist was a tough one, I am more of a workaholic then I ever was. I am constantly putting out albums monthly, and its all stream of consciousness. My sister thinks just because I churn out so much work, that the quality suffers, but that isn't true. Streaming all my ideas quickly is more professional in my opinion rather then tediously working on projects that take forever. I have a huge body of both music and art, and I don't dilly dally. I just crank it all out quickly and easily, I have tremendous momentum in creating music, and most of them are masterpieces of music, and song. "</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "How many albums do you have now???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "About 57 it seems"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "What's your favorite album thus far"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "It really is hard to say. "Frankenstein's Curse" is probably one of my best albums, but my last album which is purely instrumental, "The Evil that Men do", which shows I am a virtuoso at harmonica really is a beam of light, it really soars. But I got a lot of great albums... You just got to sift through it all, and take time to listen them"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Where can you find these albums???"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "You can listen to all my music on Bandcamp.com. That is 27 years of songwriting... Some of my favorite tracks are on Youtube as well. I have a few on CDBABY, as well for download, just clips. And all my CD's are on Createspace, and Amazon.com "</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">LH: "Well thanks Michael for your time to talk, we'll be getting back to you when things start taking off... "</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">MD: "Thanks, I'll see you soon, Bye"</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> </span>Michael D'Oraziohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13187569811946885771noreply@blogger.com0